Also known as Trauma bonding, Traumatic bonding
A strong emotional attachment to someone who is abusing you, built by cycles of harm followed by kindness. It is a research concept rather than a diagnosis, and it is not a sign of weakness.
In Psychology
A trauma bond is the powerful attachment that can form between a person and someone who is harming them. It grows in relationships with two features: a clear imbalance of power, and abuse that comes and goes — cruelty or violence, then apology, affection and promises, then cruelty again. The kind moments feel intensely relieving, and the bond can grow stronger over time rather than weaker.
Donald Dutton and Susan Painter described traumatic bonding in 1981. Their 1993 study of women who had recently left abusive partners found that intermittent abuse and power imbalance predicted how attached the women still felt months later. It helps explain why leaving is so hard and why many people go back — and in Pakistan, family pressure to keep a marriage together and fear of what people will say add to the pull. Read more on trauma bonding.
Psychology
A trauma bond is a strong emotional tie to someone who hurts you, built by cycles of cruelty and kindness. It explains why leaving is hard — it is not weakness.
27 Sept 20268 min read
